You SUCK at Life and are therefore FIRED!!!

Hope you all are ready cause this shit's about to get real!!! It ain't no big secret that I am not at all amused by assholes...nope not one iota, not in the slightest, not a smidgen and not even a itsy bitsy teenie weenie (yellow polka dot bikini) mother-effin' bit!!! I am no saint, I have had my moments and I will continue to have a moment here and there, but the point in life is to be conscious of times your inner asshole shines it's shitty head and then recognize it and put a stop to it. Next time you feel an asshole moment coming on, suppress it and be a decent human being and don't do it anymore. It's that simple. Seriously, this world would be a much better place if people could figure this the fuck out, but NOOOOO some people are scum enough to find joy in being an asshole and I am sick of being subjected to it!!!! Oh some will say, "this is life, that's just how some people are." Ummm how about no and you are no longer allowed to be an asshole in my life for free...I'm forming the asshole police and you've got some hard time ahead of you!!! What makes these people think they have the right to be like this to other people?!?! I for one know I feel like shit after I say or do something even remotely shitty to someone. Do they have no conscience?!? Cause if not then they are free to go straight to hell now, do not pass GO and do not collect $200!! These people are why this world is going to shit, because people have no regard for how their words and actions affect other people. And what's worse, these people do this with literally no shame. They say and do these things with a fake smile on their faces like people like me can't see through their slime. Well, guess what?!?! I see you and I don't play games with people like you and if I weren't forced to be in your presence, trust me I wouldn't be. I've been mistaken for being soft-spoken, but don't be fool enough to think that. You're one lucky SOB if you never hear how hard my words can be, so I'd tread lightly if you'd like to stay in the clear. It's unfortunate that I have to keep my thoughts to myself and have to be uncomfortable because I know if I say nothing, I have to deal with your shit and if I say something I have to also have that tension over my head. How about you just stop being a shit and not put me in this position?!? There is nothing more shitty than putting people in an unnecessary position like this because your issues are too great than to just GROW THE FUCK UP!!! It's all good though because Lindsay has a plan...soon I shall be in a position where I can watch you eat your words and leave you behind to sit in your own bullshit. You're right, we've never been "friends" because I, let me repeat, I chose not to be. You tried and you failed because I don't associate myself with people like you. I have always and will always choose to be on my own than to lower myself to the standards of people of your caliber. It's no loss to me because you are in no way a gain to my life and I see right through you, kinda like you're bathin' in Windex. I don't do fake so I'm sorry that your pathetic feelers are hurt because I wanted nothing to do with you. I'm ok with being thought of as a bitch because I realize that I'd rather stand alone than be surrounded by fake people...I've worn that label proudly all my life, you're just not used to having your ego hurt. But go ahead, waste more of mine, your's and everyone's lives around you with drama...such a sad, sad existence and I do not pity you for you have brought it upon yourself. So here is your severance because people like you are fired from life and shouldn't be allowed to socialize and further spread your kind of epidemic: grow up or choose to wallow in your own shit for life. Weigh that in your head for a second or not, your choice, just leave me the fuck out of it.

Cheers

I have to say I have never been one to do the whole New Year's resolution thing. To me, New Year's resolutions are kind of like Valentine's Day, an excuse to do something on one day that you should be capable of doing anytime. I can express my love not just on February 14th, but all year long. I can make changes anyday, not just because it's a new year. This year however, I am finding the upcoming new year a perfect excuse to give myself the slap in the face of a big change. Just happens to be good timing and yes, I said I needed a slap in the face and I mean that, but don't get too excited friends because it's one that needs to be self-administered. Have you ever gotten into a funk that slowly grew on you without your even having realized that you had gotten to a place you never wanted nor thought you would ever be in?!? I woke up one day and have everyday since then wondering why I didn't notice what was happening at the time and then felt the panic of, "what the hell am I gonna do now to get un-funked?!?" So I have taken a little too long at this point to find the solution to un-funking myself so I suppose this year I am going to go against my own beliefs and make myself a New Year's resolution...or 2...or 10. I am tired of living in a "haze" of what could have been and being angry with the cruel reality of the world and myself for letting it get the best of me. No more!!! "If [s]he gets up, we'll all get up, it'll be anarchy!" Well, peeps I am bringing on the "upset" in my life and ignorning all "authority," but my own. I am going to totally disrupt all that I have found normal in my life for a long time. No more being afraid of the risks that could potentially be the key to my life. Next time someone tells me change is not "safe," I am going to remind them that safe got me in my current position and also that sometimes, safe is stupid. I want a remarkable life, not one where the marks have gotten me nowhere. Need to pull out my inner Tawanda so to speak and pull myself up by my bootstraps. And please, feel free to join me if you and I are sailing in the same boat. So, yeah cheers to me bitches ;)