As I sit here thinking about the news I heard today of two 12 year olds committing suicide in the last couple weeks, it makes my heart hurt. What's worse is they were friends of my 12 year old niece who is having a seriously hard time coping with it. No 12 year old should have to experience that and no 12 year old should be taking their own life. No one should take their own life, but I guess when you feel like no one loves you and you were picked on and you had no one in your corner, suicide might seem like the only way to relieve the pain. ::Shakes my head:: This is why it is each and every person's duty to do all that you can to make sure the people in your life never feel this way by you...you must do your utmost to make sure that the people you love, know you love them without a doubt. And when you think they're the "bees knees" flippin' tell them!!! They deserve to know. So for those of you who may not know about my tattoo or have read my very first blog about Neverland, this all ties into the meaning behind it. I have a tattoo of 2 stars. They are the second star to the right from Peter Pan, which is how you find your way to Neverland. Not that I think anyone reading this is not familiar with Peter Pan, but to refresh your memory, Neverland is a place where children never have to grow up and most days I absolutely wish this were true. Today included. I wish for a world where children never have to grow and see all of the pain this world sometimes has to offer. Not that all children are exempt from pain, some of them know nothing else, but I wish that we all could have the innocence of children and live in a world where we don't have to face all of the evil things that you come to realize as adults. Living in pain to the point of taking your life is one of them. I have always been fascinated by suicide. Now hold up, before you think I enjoy it or that I am completely morbid, let me explain why. I personally cannot fathom what someone's mindset and feelings could be to get to the point of taking your own life. I've had hard times, but no despair so strong that I would ever think about ending my life. I think life is a horrible thing to waste and that no life should be taken unnecessarily. I also tend to feel a great deal of anger surrounding suicide because usually there are so many factors that contibuted to it, but none so terrible a factor as a fellow human being. To hear that someone was bullied or that people were so cruel as to refuse to befriend them is unbelievable to me and more often than not this is a main reason for suicide. I know not every person in this world will be your cup of tea, but for God's sake there is no reason to shit on people...EVER. NO ONE should ever bully and no one should ever be completely friendless. It really makes me wonder what kind of parents child bullies have or how oblivious parents and teachers must be to see none of this. Or how oblivious we all must be to see someone suffering like this and to not extend a hand in friendship. Like anyone could ever say "Me? Take on a new friend? No thanks, I have enough." I mean I know you can't see and know everything, but I personally find it obvious when two people don't get along or when someone is uncomfortable in someone's presence. You notice the lack of interaction between them or the tension. There just needs to be more attention paid. I had a teacher worry about me in kindergarten beacuse I wasn't interacting with other students. In my case it was just that I was an only child and was used to going out and doing things on my own, but at least she was paying attention. I think parents need to volunteer in their children's class rooms and I think teachers need to do more to bring kids together. I think people need to be asked more often how they are doing and for people to really listen to the answer. I am no child psychologist or anything, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know kids in the elementary school age are at an EXTREMELY impressionable age. They mimic, they imitate and they feed off of everything. Don't you think it'd be a good time to teach them to stop bullying or to simply never start before their brains start to close the incoming feed and run off of the information we already gave them?!? In some cases they may have received great info and they can run with that and be amazing human beings, but this world has no vacancy for more bullies...there is way too much supply of them for a NON-EXISTENT DEMAND. I think there should be "getting to know you" programs. I think there should be ways for kids to learn cool things about each other and see what they have in common rather than how they are different. And that any differences there may be should be shown in a positive way. Like, some bully kid doesn't like some other kid because they think they are different from them and then they find out that they have the same favorite color, and the same favorite movies and they both like dogs...all of a sudden the other person doesn't seem so different. Of if there is a difference then find a creative way to emphasize how that contirbutes to them being a cool person. I know seems too simple or maybe it seems too diffcult since we're not already doing it, but I think it'd work in at least more cases than none. It'd be worth a try. The point is, squash all inclination toward hate when they're young enough to lose such prejudices and reinforce love and acceptance. Never wait to tell someone they're wonderful or they did a great job or that you love them. There's no reason to wait. NONE. Sometimes it's the little things that can make or break and sometimes those little things mean a TON to someone. Never make the mistake of not telling someone how much they are loved and appreciated and never be afraid that you might sound "ridiculous" if you do. I'd rather a kind word roll off someone unappreciative than a horrible comment or lack of attention all together stab someone in the heart. Campaign for Kindness people, Campaign for Kindness. Word.
Very good Lindsay, I absolutley worry about this kind of thing ALL the time and Tristen is only in Kindergaten, the sad things is I have a reason to worry about it already and he is only six, he has a boy in his daycare that is way older then the rest and picks on Tristen and his friend. Me and Jake have talked and talked about what you do as a parent, what the right thing to teach your child now a days is....Do you teach them the sticks and stones theory or teach them to stand up for themselves at all costs. We take the 50 50 approach, a little of both. We teach him to treat everyone great and that it is never okay to be mean because he doesnt like it when kids are mean to him, we also teach him that there will be a point in his life when some one will push him to hard and then he himself needs to decide when enough is enough and stand up. We also make a very clear point to him that NO MATTER what happens when he is doing what he feels is right, he will be making the right choice and will have a mommy and daddy there to back him. It is very important as parents to inquire all thoughts and feelings and scenarios in with how you parent. I do worry about Tristen being bullied but he will NEVER be left alone in ANYTHING that he does EVER he will always value his life and others as well. As a parent you should tell your kids everynight what they mean to you and how much you love them. We have a saying in our house everyday all the time....we always ask the kids how do I love you and then stretch our arms way out and when their eyes get really big and ask "WOW that much?" we tell them nope we love you way more then that!!!!
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